The Voice of The People Has a Deaf Ear

There is only one radio station that is responsible for making me question everything I was spoon fed since birth. I owe my coming out to WLS 89 AM, Rush, Hannity, Mark Levin and all the local Chicago hosts who have bravely stood up against liberal policies.

When I won the contest and my first show was approaching I was desperate for a different angle. I was eager to be a conservative voice covering hot topics and little local stories that may have been missed during the week.

I dabbled with Stephanie Miller but the language is not fit for my young son. Hal Sparks is the only host that makes me want to punch a wall. If I ever meet him I will have to resist picking him up and…I digress. The urban talk radio station in Chicago is the home of nationally popular hosts and out spoken local personalities. I have heard one of their host tell listeners during the last mayor election, to vote for Carol Moseley Braun because is was black.

I still listen occasionally, with all the violence in Chicago I want to hear what the residents are saying about the attacks. Next month the station is celebrating its 50th anniversary with a huge gala event. The promos have been running for weeks, listing all the celebrities scheduled to be part of this historical event. I enjoy listening to the timeline of how the station was started and maintained its status for 50 years.

I thought the tickets were all $50. While listening to the morning show this week I heard a caller talk about buying two $250 tickets instead of the $500 tickets she really wanted. I almost drove off the road. This station spent hours telling voters that Mitt was too rich to truly understand struggling black people. They talk endlessly about the lack of jobs and resources in the neighborhoods of their audience.

Later the mid-morning host was promoting the gala and said the $100 tickets would get you a really nice reception. After the commercial break, she apologized and said $100 does not get you a reception. I went online to see what the ticket options were. The only remaining tickets are $118.96 and $274.90 with fees and taxes. The cheap tickets were actually $67.65 at checkout. VIP tickets are available at the station.

Help me out. This gala is to celebrate “THE” urban talk station that has a show called “Keeping It Real” and real people suffering under policies of Obama, the former King Daley and current Mini Mafia Mayor are being kept away by high priced tickets.

The hosts and callers constantly say that black money should be spent in our community, “We need to support our black owned businesses”. The historical venue is located in the heart of downtown Chicago. I searched the theater’s site for parking suggestions. If you pre-pay it is $21. When I drove downtown for 3 hours on a Saturday afternoon, the fees were $27-$34. I started taking the train for $7 round trip. The event is scheduled on a Saturday evening. Most people won’t use public transportation given that the event may not end until after 10pm.

The Chatham 14 Theater would have been the idea venue. Free parking and it is a short distance from the radio station. The list of famous people scheduled to appear could have donated their time to keep the prices down. Imagine a red carpet event where the common listeners get to shake hands with people they love. Everyone could be VIP’s! I paid $50 for CPAC in 2012 and I got to sit wherever I could squeeze in. During the day at times I was arms length from a few of my idols. If I pay $500 for a ticket, I want one of the speakers to appear at my next book club meeting.

This station has a rich history of being the voice of black Chicago but apparently they are blind to the financial pains of the listeners. Maybe I am a tight-wad but $67 for cheap seats is a lot of money. The VIP tickets are used to separate the classes, so bourgeois (we call in it "boo-jee" in the hood). These are the very policies they bash daily. Bottom up economics my Aunt Fannie.

Maybe I am missing something? Please correct me.

Jesse Louis Jackson

On Saturday, February 2, 2013 I finally made it to the Rainbow Push forum. I decided I had to attend and participate in the walk for Hadiya Pendleton, the 42nd person killed by gun viloence in January.

I grew up in the 70’s and my grade school did expose us to black history which included the civil rights movement. Even then I rejected Jesse Jackson as the self designated leader of black Americans. I did not like how he seemed to ride on the coattails of the honorable Rev. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr.. I know he was there on the front line walking and working with Dr. King but even then I failed to see what he had done for us lately. The fake boycotts of companies that seem to only net something for his personal causes and not so much black people as a group was not enough.

When I got to the church, a woman herded attendees to fill the middle front rows. When the broadcast started at 10:00am only 9 rows were occupied, more people arrived later. A wonderful choir and other speakers filled the agenda prior to Jesse Jackson’s appearance. One group from the westside wore “My Life is Valuable 2” t-shirts. One member held a large picture of a young man shot to death recently while eating at a fast-food restaurant. Later, I looked into the incident, the police have him documented as a gang member. On Saturday he was presented as an innocent victim simply eating dinner.

Dr. Brenda Butler of Columbia College spoke about her Columbia Links project. It is a journalism and leadership program for Chicago Public School teens and teachers. The group is responsible for the posters “Don’t Shoot I Want to Grow Up” campaign.

Having only seen Jesse Jackson as this “iconic” figure on television I expected him to appear more human and less like a rehearsed self-serving activist, I was wrong. The speakers are all careful to always refer to him honorably by using his full title and name. He is the same activist I have listened to since childhood, delivering catchy one liners that he would occasionally have the audience repeat.

I agreed with him calling for the people to stop harboring the criminals. He compared the citizens’ refusal to snitch to the Chicago Police Departments “Blue Code” of silence. Most of the crimes go unsolved because no one will come forth and say what they saw. He called for President Obama to come to Chicago. I called for Obama to hold town hall style meetings in June. He was here raising campaign funds and never took any time to address the violence. As a former “community organizer” why wouldn’t he offer solutions to the very people he once worked with in high crime areas? Don’t be fooled, Jackson and his demand to have Obama come here is all choreographed. He would be hard pressed to speak publicly in a negative manner about this historical president.

Jackson did mention Jesse Jr.’s book and his reference to Thanksgiving and slavery. Jackson Rule #1: Always be promoting your brand, family. I was shocked that Jonathan was not speaking. In the weeks since Junior’s resignation Jonathon has suddenly appeared on some Saturdays sounding very statesmen-like. I would be shocked if he is not appointed or elected to a stepping stone position soon.

Jackson’s speech included many reasons for the crime in the city. He said banks got bail outs and we got locked out. Lack of after school programs but access to guns that are not made in the city but yet are brought into Chicago. No black owned gun manufacturers or shops. He shared some financial statistic on poverty, historical statements on slavery and comment on Romney’s off-shore accounts. He never called for us to take responsibility for our own children. He did say if the parents can’t raise the kids properly society must step in.

The meeting ended with collecting donations. Those giving $100 were called to stand and an usher walked to the person and took the money. I saw a woman that Jackson had introduced earlier stand up in the front row and pass him a crisp $100 bill. Then those giving $50, $35 and so on were called.

We drove to Hadiya’s school, coincidentally located on the same street just 4 blocks north. The march was 6 blocks long from beginning at Martin Luther King College Prep High School, ending at the park located 4400 south on Oakenwald Avenue. When Jackson arrived we were told to line up in pairs behind him. I was paired with a man from the westside who survived on disability checks and money he made from panhandling. He showed me his medication; he was happy to have raised enough from begging to buy them. The next young man I walked with had played basketball for a well known Chicago high school and used that opportunity to attend college. He was well dressed and a minister in a jail and was asked by Jackson to attend. He drove in from the western suburbs.

Members of the television, print and online media followed us as we navigated the streets. People in cars blew their horns and waved in support of the march. Jackson held a short press conference once we arrived. The shelter is located in a public park, the gunman jumped the fence to shoot at the group seeking cover from the rain. Hadiya and her friends were out of school early after a day of exams. She was not affiliated with any gang.

It was very cold and I was not looking forward to the walk back. Jesse Jackson gathered us to begin the return trip and said he wanted to make sure we stayed together for safety. At some point we were told to board the chartered school bus intended for the group from the westside. Jackson chose to ride on the bus and not in his black limo. I sat next to a nice woman who had just completed a job readiness program at a local junior college. She was eager to tell me that she had formerly worked for Alderman Sandi Jackson, “She’s very sweet”, I bit my tongue. I engaged her in conversation about the viloence and feeling safe as a Chicago resident. She said that living in fear is not the answer, she had faith in God.

As we got off the bus he shook our hand. He was looking away and talking to one of his handlers when it was my turn. My sister reminded me that I did shake the hand that once shook Dr. King’s hand.

Cancun 2013 - Let Go, Let God

Since winning the WLS Next Talk Star contest in August my busy life has been even busier. After my 2 hour show that was included among my winnings I have been asked to fill from time to time. I get excited and terrified because WLS is the best. The last thing I want is to hurt their reputation therefore I prepare tirelessly days before, making sure I am versed on the latest political news, pop culture and current events. I absolutely love it!

In the midst of parenting, volunteering, the election and the holiday season I all but forgot that I also won a vacation for 2 from Funjet trip to Riviera Maya. There were many emails sent between the WLS promotions manager and myself trying to confirm a date. Once the date was set I got busy preparing for our absence. These details were a welcomed distraction form my fear of flying. I have flown but I hate it, period. I was asking everyone I knew to pray for me to relax and not fret getting there and returning home.

One day before my trip we were expecting early morning snow. I was pleased to see they were wrong as I peeked at my van to make sure the remote start was warming my van. I exited my house with about 9 minutes to get to church on time. My reasoning for leaving so late occasionally is, praise and worship was created for people like me; 10-15 minutes of singing gives everyone a chance to get in place for the message.

Well, there was no snow but my van was covered a stubborn layer of ice. I spent at least 10 minutes trying to clear my windows enough just to get on the road. No matter how I banged and chipped that ice would not break up. Why didn’t I go to church last night? Why didn’t I leave 30 minutes before, (like I tell my son who leaves for his job 10 minutes before his shift starts)? Why didn’t I pull into the garage? I was about to give up but I needed to go get to church.

I got there and parked on the gravel section. I grabbed all my belongings to rush in to claim the seat my daughter-in-law was saving. I hurried out and the moment I slammed the door it was clear, I was not in control, I landed on all 4 points (both elbows and knees). I was flat on the invisible ice literally unable to move for about 30 seconds. I was afraid to even attempt to get up. I sat through the service with my knees throbbing. My pastor shared a great message that morning but one thing stood out, “Fear is not of God”. I left church feeling better about my impending plane ride.

I called the airline when I got home just to ask a few questions. The customer service person said my flight was a charter and I needed to call Funjet. Oh, no, charter sounds like a little crop-duster plane, yikes. I decided to check my Facebook notifications before making the call. There was a post by WLS offering condolences to the family of Jake Hartford. I did not understand what I was reading, he was just on the air 2 days before. How could that be?

I have been a fan of his quirky dry humor since 1993. Listening to warm stories of  Miss Dill Pickle and the boys made them seem more like neighbors to me. His bumper music, regular contributors and deadpan delivery made “Awake with Jake” a good reason to get up at 5AM on Saturday. There was a gray cloud hanging over me the entire day, I loved Jake Hartford.

That night it hit me that I spent too much time in fear and I needed to realize that God was in control, my faith assures me of that. Life is too short to be lead by fear. I decided to enjoy this amazing opportunity God has granted my husband and me.

The Cancun weather forecast was rain and temperatures ranging from 79-82 degrees. I was “afraid” that our week would ruined. When we safely landed the pilot informed us that it was 84 and sunny, God is good.

For the next 3 nights and 4 days we were treated to the honeymoon we never had. My 3 words to describe the RIU Palace are, clean, friendly and luxurious. Funjet exceeded my expectations, they will have my travel business from now on.

There are more trip details to come……

Illinois Rep. La Shawn Ford

I heard Rep. Ford on the Bruce and Dan Show, 89 WLS AM Thursday morning on December 13, 2012. He was promoting an emergency town hall meeting to protest the school closings proposed by the board of Chicago Public Schools. It was his argument that westside schools were disproportionately targeted.

It was arrogance on his part to believe he could agree to an interview on a conservative talk radio station and not be asked about his appearance in a federal court just two days prior. He pleaded not guilty to 17 counts of bank fraud. Ford has denied lying to the now failed Shorebank to obtain a line of credit. He seemed completely caught of guard when Dan Proft asked about the charges. He replied, “Are you guys serious about asking me that question?”. They were very kind to him considering the circumstances.

I was intrigued by this “wrongly” accused elected official and decided to attend his emergency town hall meeting that night. My motive was to see for myself if he was sincere or trying to improved his tarnished image.

For well over two hours attendees listened several speakers expressing their opinions about CPS closing under utilized schools. I saw only one wireless microphone resting on the stage representing one of the major news stations. If there was one designated theme it was their dislike for how CPS has treated schools in poor black and Hispanic neighborhoods. The blame list was long, Mayor Emanuel, his cronies that financially back charter schools, Bill Gates, Race to the Top, the Commission on School Utilization, no one was safe from criticism. Even the pastor that opened the meeting with a prayer was thrown under the bus. He was long gone by the time someone called him a trader for signing a petition to support the opening a charter school in the neighborhood.

When I saw the reporter remove the microphone it never occurred to me that the temperament would quickly go from refined community organizers to angry protestors demanding war and calling for sit-ins and shutting down schools. Suddenly from the rear of the room a woman had everyone’s attention, she was tired of meetings and called for action. Almost on cue it was the fault of the white man. Rich white folks don’t want poor people or blacks in the city. She stated that she had 3 degrees and was a teacher for 15 years. She shouted phrases like, ethnic cleansing, high powered white folks, killing our children. The room got very loud and less civil. She agreed to lead a follow up meeting, even though she started her rant by informing us she hated meetings, she wanted action. The meeting would be held at 11:00am the following Monday at Rep. Ford‘s Chicago office. It struck me as odd since she was a teacher and Monday was a school day. They closed the meeting in prayer that called for Ford to get God’s help through the trails he was experiencing.

On Monday I arrived at the next meeting on time. The receptionist told me that I was the first to arrive. I decided to patronize a local shop to pass some time. When I returned 15 minutes later there were 2 women waiting. I engaged them in conversation about the CPS and school closings. Eventually I could no longer hide my conservative views. At some point a young man from Thursday’s meeting arrived and joined in our discussion. They were all eager to give me a list of books I should read. We shared ideas respectfully without shouting. After remaining silent during the first meeting it felt great to come out of the closet as a conservative. The women were educators of many years and had a great deal to say about what was wrong with Chicago Public Schools but had little to offer when I asked why we keep electing the same type of leaders while expecting different results.

About 11:45am Rep. Ford walked in, he said since he didn’t call the meeting he didn‘t feel that he had to attend. I left around noon and never saw that woman who had called for action and scheduled the meeting. Four people including myself bothered to show up. I honestly feel the woman that was yelling for action was a plant. They needed to take the focus off Ford’s charges.

In conclusion there are too many organizations working on a problem that can be solved by getting parents involved with the PTA. I lost count of the organizations, committees, unions and coalitions represented at the “emergency” town hall meeting even organizers from Chicago Teachers Union were in attendance. They meet to schedule more meetings without results. I would love to know how those all those groups are funded.

I really wanted to be wrong about Rep. La Shawn Ford but it was obvious that the only emergency reviving his damaged image.

Top 5 Finalist, Pinch Me!

I just finished listening to the audio clips of the 4 people trying to keep me from being crowned The Next 89 WLS Talk Star and I am so happy I waited until now to do so. Had I listened to them prior I might have to dropped out, those contestants sound great. Originally I thought about submitting a mock show clip but I thought the people judging the applicants needed to hear who I am and how I came to be.

Tomorrow is the live broadcast where we will fight to the death for the title. I am nervous, excited and still in awe of how I made it to the top 5. I should not be shocked because I have support from almost everyone in my life. My husband kept telling me I would make it to this point. Of course my mom, sister and children have encouraged me. My friends from grade school that have opposing political views even voted for me. The girls from high school (in my mind we are frozen in time which is why I call them girls) were so kind. Facebook friends made me feel like a rock star, it was sweet. There is a group of people I need to give a loud shout-out to, Lisle residents, they are the best townies on the planet. Everywhere I went they engaged me and asked me to them posted, throughout my journey.

Whatever happens tomorrow I have exceeded my dreams already, my name was mentioned on the same station were my favorite conservative personalities are heard. How did that happen? I just hope I don't embarrass my family and friends and simply have a good time. If the ride ends tomorrow, I won't complain. I do feel horrible about missing the high school open house, it's nerdy but I love going.

Thank you all!

I Still Don't Believe It

I made my peace about not getting a call Monday and came clean that I had entered a contest and lost.
Yesterday I was working the Jr. High registration helping at the Booster table when I saw a 312 number on my phone. A woman said she was from WLS 890 AM and asked if I had ever been paid to be on the radio and if I had ever paid to be on the radio (I didn't know you could pay to be on the radio). I replied no to both questions. The woman then told me I was one of the 10 finalist.

I could not wrap my mind around what she said. I called my husband, he told me that I just won him $10, good news, wait who bet against me? I was beaming like an idiot the entire time I was working. I had no words to tell the friends that I encountered. How did I get picked? The top ten will have their bios and pictures posted and the 5 with the highest votes make it to a live broadcast. I am thrilled but terriffied.

Mother's Day 2012 and the Stupid Black Cat

I never verbally expressed what I wanted for Mother's Day after I mentioned that the iPad was the number one gift this season, hint, hint. My husband and adult children are great at giving me things that I want and sometimes things that I didn't even know I wanted. This year I was shocked when opened my gifts, God delivered big time.

I work part-time at a scrapbook store and like most crafters I am behind in preserving my family memories. I am always green with envy when I wait on customers stocking up for scrapbook weekend. I could only imagine what it would be like to have 48 hours to scrap as much as I wanted.

I am also training for my second Chicago Marathon which means I am always suffering from minor aches and pains. Years ago I went in the Coldwater Creek Spa to buy a gift card, you can smell the aroma therapy as soon as the elevators open. I have dreamed of getting a pedicure or a massage there.

I was surprised when my son Julian and his wife gave me a scrapbook weekend, wow. I had just taped a B & B brochure for scrapbookers inside the cabinet in my craftroom with the thought of one day in the distant future. Then my daughter presented me with a gift certificate from Coldwater Creek Spa for a deep tissue 50 minute massage. I hit the jackpot, I had never told anyone.

My mom was visiting and needed a ride home with her gift. I have avoided driving her since she stopped riding on the expressway but I was felt so good about my haul that I eagerly took on the journey. It is normally a 35 minute trip on a Sunday night but on the side streets the travel time is doubled. She did the usual passenger seat driving despite the fact that I have a clean driving record, I didn't care. When we got there I carried her TV up 3 flights of stairs and plugged it into the cable box; I wanted her to be as happy as I was so I did my best to set her up until the cable guy could hook up the HD cables. I even tried to program the Comcast remote for the TV but that was beyond my pay grade. I was floating, this was one of the best Mother's Day ever.

I left her apartment and eagerly headed to the expressway. Just as I made it to the entrance ramp a black cat crossed in front of my van. I am not superstitious, all I could think about was how that stupid cat was going to get hurt or killed on the Dan Ryan. It was about 5 minutes later that a light on my dashboard lit up. I called my husband and described the symbol as a sailboat. Simultaneously we figured out my engine was over heating, yikes. I kept telling myself to stay calm. When I finally decided to get off the Stevenson I was at Pulaski Road. I was home, the first 15 years of my life were spent riding the Pulaski bus and the south end was the neighborhood I traveled through for 4 years to high school.

Well, high school was 29 years ago and everything was different. My husband stayed on the line as I drove forever (5 minutes) looking for a gas station. He told me to buy coolant, when I saw the price I knew it was cheaper at Walmart but I had no choice. The station was attended by a lone woman behind bullet proof glass, she couldn't open my hood. Bill tried to talk me through it but I could not get it, I felt like such a girl, I had never opened my hood. I approached a young man for assistance, he kindly and easily opened my hood. I was not sure where the radiator was, he showed me and pointed out the warning to use special coolant, my van is 12 years old, the manufacturers warranty expired before this kid could drive. I poured the entire bottle in and filled the empty container with water as a backup in the event it over heated before I got home.

I was back on the Stevenson within 20 minutes or so, still flying high but wondering out what the lesson was. I did learn how to pop open the hood and pour a little crushed red pepper in the radiator to impede the small leak which has since been repaired. I wonder what happened to that stupid black cat, hope he made it home safely.

President Barack Obama Could Have Been Great

Barack Hussein Obama II was the 44th man to take the oath as president but he is different from all the rest. For the first time the President of the United States could have truly inspired those who grew up believing the American dream was just out of reach due to their race or circumstances. It is time to call him out for failing to do the one thing that only a president that looks like him can do. If others before had even attempted the same they would have been called racist and out of touch. Obama could have been a great president. Imagine him standing at a microphone and delivering a speech to a group of Americans that have survived for many generations by depending on government programs. I am not referring to the permanently disabled, I am focusing on those that have been programmed to believe the government owes them food, housing, clothing and a cell phone.

Recently he came to his hometown Chicago to raise campaign funds, it was during one of our violent weekends. Obama could have done something that no other president has ever done, skip the V.I.P. events and golf to hold town hall meetings in the neighborhoods most effected by the weekly senseless killings. If I were on his staff as an advisor one of the first speeches would have spoken directly to those who feel like it really doesn’t matter who is the White House because their situation will never change. He could have said the following on January 21, 2009 or when he came to Chicago last spring:

 “Good morning my fellow Americans, I am eager to put this country back track but I need everyone to get on board. As a community organizer I worked in the neighborhoods effected by blight, lack of jobs and violence. I know what you are battling and together we can make it better. Get some skin in the game, take personal responsibility for your well being.

I am calling for everyone to finish high school. If college is a goal, great, start with a junior college. The truth is college is not for everyone, the world needs ditch diggers too. There’s no shame in an honest day of hard work. Economics professor Walter E. Williams has a 3 part plan to defeat poverty:

1. Graduate high school, find a job, keep a job (work to excel)!
2. Don’t have children until you are married!
3. When you get married, stay married!

If you have the desire to change your situation that's the first step. There are government, private and faith based programs available right now for temporary assistance, use them but don’t make them a permanent fixture for your family. The government can never give you the self-respect gained by being in control of your own destiny. Our framers said, “…life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness”, you must do the pursuing.

Take responsibility for your neighborhoods, home is where you raise your families and lay your head. Most Americans are not living in fear of their neighbors. In the days of the civil rights movement black families feared the KKK and other hate groups dedicated to violence against non-whites. The enemy had white skin making them easier to identify but in 2012 the victims and perpetrators are identical. Martin Luther King Jr. died fighting for the right for equal rights, school aged kids getting shot while sitting on their porches is not his dream, it the nightmare many of us are living in everyday.

Stop playing the blame game, evil slave owners are dead. The sins of slavery left a dark mark on the America’s timeline but you get to thrive in the same land your ancestors were forced to build; you can honor them by not wasting the blessing of being born in the Land of the Free. Some of you are thinking there are still racist people how can I succeed, of course there are still folks that hate anyone that doesn’t look like them, they must be really mad about November 4, 2008. Don’t you believe the lie that if you are not white and or rich you can’t make it in this county. Think about our brown brothers and sisters living south of us, they risk everything just for a chance to live where we were born. They pack a bag and leave everything behind. They were born in a country where everyone looks like them and speaks their language but yet they are eager to walk, run and hide for a chance to live in the United States of America, land of endless possibilities.

Make a change, be the change, you are a role model to your family and neighbors. If you have children that you cannot live with please stay involved in their lives. Children need rules, boundaries and corrections but more importantly a feeling that someone really cares. God’s plan is a man and a woman are needed to create a human being, sadly too many families are being lead by only one parent. Single parents have a tough job but it is not impossible. Ask yourself what do my children think of me, is my behavior worthy of praise? Children did not ask to be here, you brought him here so take care of them, all of them. Finally, America was built with the blood sweat and tears of people from all over the planet, the great melting pot, you can be whatever you want to be if you are willing to work hard, look at me.”

The last three years Our Fearless Leader has blamed Bush and the Republicans. He has appeared numerous times waving his finger at the rich for not paying their fair share. Instead of uniting the country he divided America into the “haves” and the “have-nots”. If you are uninformed you might be led to believe the rich are responsible for the ills plaguing our economic recovery. I know there are those who falsely believe that if greedy rich people were simply willing to pay taxes Our President could create more jobs. Has he ever given a speech about cutting the spending. Confiscate every penny made by the 1% for the next ten years and the greedy fat cats in D.C. will spend that and more. He could have been a great president because he can say things that no other President could.

Midnight Mass

I have not been Catholic for many years but Christmas Eve will always take me back to those unforgettable midnight mass services at Our Lady Of Lourdes on the corner of 15th and Keeler in Chicago. My sister and I were members of the student choir, we attended O.L.O.L grade school across the street. They never held tryouts or evaluations and for that I am happy, I would have never made the cut. I wish that God had given me the gift of beautiful voice or at least one decent enough to sing a lullaby without my son placing his hand over my mouth to quiet the screeching.

We would give up Saturday mornings for weeks in preparation of this very special service. Midnight mass was guaranteed to pack the house forcing parishioners to stand in the rarely used balcony. We always shopped for a new outfit which included shoes. One year my step-mom took us to Madigans, I got a 2 piece light tweed suit and my sister Marvine chose a red and cream sweater dress, our shoes were a perfect match. My mother made sure our hair was flawless.

The church was dimly lit with the warm glow of candles. Poinsettias were placed on every flat surface. Father Cross wore festive robes and "Rejoice" banners hung from the ceiling. The mood in the sanctuary was different from Sunday services, there was feeling of quiet peace. I wish I could remember the woman's name, she was a member of the adult choir. She wore a short Afro, tasteful make-up and large fashion earrings, she sang like an angel. One hymn that silenced the entire church every time she sang the words. "Oh Come, Oh Come Emanuel" still gives me chills though I have not heard anyone do it justice since my last midnight mass. The woman's voice was so strong and penetrating. When she bellowed "REJOICE, REJOICE, Emanuel" every space was filled with her rich deep voice, she never failed to bring me to tears. The coveted lead part of "Amen" was always given to an older female member of the children's choir, not me. My absolute favorite part of the night was when the entire choir sang "Hark How The Bells" in full harmony. The school principal was the director of the choir, she had spent many hours correcting our errors but that night she smiled with pride. In the 70's all nuns could play piano and or guitar all while spanking you for talking back, good times.

When the mass ended we rushed home because my mother allowed us to open our gifts that night. We joined the our dear friends from chior who lived downstairs and played with our newly gained loot until the sun came up. Bowls of mixed nuts in the shell, my step-dad Robert singing Nat King Cole with such confidence and midnight mass are all part of my wonderful Christmas memories.

Laws Of Kindness

On Saturday September 18, 2010 a dream of mine came true, I attended a Beth Moore Living Proof Live event. In January of 2000 I delivered a stillborn son, Thaddeus Ace, 2 months after I was baptised. I was a new Christian and could not reconcile why God would allow that to happen to our family. I struggled with the my relationship with God and decided to walk away from the church.

In the fall of 2005 my friend Lucy U. invited me to a Wednesday morning bible study at her church. The study was a DVD presentation of Beth Moore, I had no idea who she was. I have not missed a Wednesday morning study since. We have had a variety of studies but Beth is my favorite. I have one of her books on my iPod and I will listen to it until I drift off, over and over.

Beth is based in Houston, Lucy moved to there a few years ago so I thought I would one day attend her study during a visit with Lucy. Nine months a go I was surfing her website and learned she was coming to Chicago, I put it on my calender. During my spring bible study the leaders of our church asked for volunteers to help organize efforts of women who would be interested in attending. I was happy to help. During the training with her staff we were told of opportunities to help at the event, yes was my first thought. After I read the description of the jobs I chose "Encourager", which meant I would pray with women who felt move by the event to ask for encouragement. There would be a call to prayer and we would be waiting to place a hand on their shoulder and pray with them. I feel like I freshman prayer surrounded by master level women. That position allowed me to serve, not miss any of the event and get preferred seating.

That morning I had some minor set backs but I was so excited that I just smiled and stayed focused, the enemy was not going to win. During the morning training session I listened to the job description and started plotting how I could change jobs. I was convinced that I would be babbling like an idiot and turn those women away from the church. The trainer said God will pair you a woman that you can relate to, "trust me it works out that way".

I was seated in the fourth row behind the orchestra pit. When she appeared on stage it was like I was seeing an old friend. The title of the study was "Laws Of Kindness". She presented 8 steps of being kind. One step was "Don't Mistake Kindness for Weakness", it hit home because I had just sent an email with that title. I was a very difficult email to write, it took me 45 minutes and I only sent a few lines. I kept editing the message, my first thought was to go out of character and use harsh language but like Beth said I was conscience of the fact that our words can be passed on and on in the modern age and that is just not me.

There I was taking notes on my lap just like I have seen women do in so many DVD's. I tried to relax and take it all in, enjoy the moment. Travis Cottrell and the Praise Team opened the show, they were singing all the songs I have learned at church, my eyes filled with tears, I was home.

Just before our final break Beth called for women that felt the need for prayer to make their way down to one of the women in the blue vest, yikes that was me. I got very scared. I was not ready, I had no idea what I could say to women seeking the comfort of prayer. I thought about my bible studies when everyone closes the sessions in prayer and those women are rock stars, why had I volunteered for this task? I was thinking that since there were so many encouragers I may not get anyone in my line. I grabbed a hand full of tissues and I waited. It took sometime but as the worship team's singing filled the room with something good, the lines started forming and suddenly there was a woman headed toward me, help!

I asked her name and where she was from. Anita was from Ohio and had a friend standing behind her. She talked about being in an unhealthy relationship, wow, I know a little something about that considering my first marriage. I got nervous , forgot her name but asked her to repeat it then I started praying. At some point I mentioned Thaddeus and my separation from God. Suddenly I was using the tissues I had intended for my "customers". We were hugging because the music was very loud, amazing feeling. She sat down and there was no one in my line. I got more tissue and focused on the moment. Suddenly I was convicted about my relationship with my daughter and I started crying. As a mom we struggle at different times with all our children. A beautiful woman approached me, she was about my age, stylish and fit, age was all we had in common. She wanted me to pray for her 20 year old daughter Jessica who she feared was an alcoholic. Bingo! We started chatting and praying. Her daughter has traits like mine, type A, driven and doing well in school. She and Jessica had an open relationship, no secrets but with her 21st birthday approaching she feared that her daughter would soon hit bottom and maybe have an accident. I again used the tissue but offered her some first. I will never forget those women. A woman came to collect my blue vest and I made a joke about wanting to keep it, I had survived.

I went back to my seat to grab the gift I made for Beth, for 8 hours I was wrestling with how to get the gift to her or should I just mail it later. I was so moved by the moment I knew that I may never get such a time as this (Esther study) to express what she means to me. I stayed up until 2 am preparing a little compact and a letter. I spotted the trainer just before she closed the back stage area and told her I was losing my nerve but I really wanted Beth to have my gift. She was very sincere when she said she would make sure Beth got my gift.

If you love Jesus and know the bible go to Beth Moore Live, if you love Jesus and don't have a clue about the bible go see Beth Moore Live, if you don't have a personal relationship with God, go see Beth Moore Live. I have seen those Dead Heads in Grant park that give up their lives to travel with the Grateful Dead (I don't get it) but I could see how a person would want to be surrounded by that energy of thousands of women and "a few brave men" worshiping together. For years I wondered if she took multiple takes to get the perfect DVD presentation and after seeing her live I am convinced she has been anointed by God to lead bible studies, she's flawless and her message is God breathed.

My only regret was that I did not share the experience with a friend or family member, I will next time.

"Let's Roll"

Next year the 10th anniversary of 9-11 will fall on a Sunday, that is no coincidence. We all have our stories of where we were and how that time was different from anytime in our recent memory. Today there are so many tributes to what took place that day but the most important monument has yet to be erected. I still find it unbelievable that those towers were not rebuilt stronger and taller as a message to our enemies that we are Americans and we can not be defeated by evil. I can only speculate why that area remains empty, is there so much pain tied to that day, are there so many groups passionate about what should be done that they are unable to work together. I believe that some leaders think we were asking for 9-11 because we are arrogant, capitalist, so proud of our country. Maybe they feel if we rebuild we are again asking to be a target. We were minding our business that day when nearly 3000 people left their homes and never returned. We need to accept that we can never appease evil groups that want to eliminate us just because we are free. If we don't rebuild we are still targets but we are also showing them that they won. Tod Beamer 's "Let's Roll" was a phrase that gave us chills, what happened to that feeling of nothing can keep us down. I pray that New York will be led by leaders that understand what those towers meant to the world. I pray that in 365 days we will be talking about the ground breaking ceremony of the new twin towers.

The Greatest Country on Earth

This the day Americans can brag about our great country. We have been accused of being arrogant and boastful but on the July 4th we must shout from the roof tops and drape everything in red, white and blue. I need to clarify that I love the United States of America and I feel somewhat sorry for anyone who lives here and does that feel the same way. I cannot imagine waking up everyday in a place where I didn't feel special. I realized it was God's grace that I was born in this skin, to my parents and on this great land. Thank you Jesus.

I am a conservative but in my effort to explore all views I have searched up and down the radio dial for a different voice. Twice I have tuned into a black talk radio station and heard a host then a caller say "I don't know how black people can celebrate the 4th of July", I found myself yelling at the radio. I took history, I was glued to my TV for seven nights in a row when Roots was first aired so I know that black people were brought here against their will and enslaved for a long time. My ancestors helped to build this country, their blood was shed to gain equal rights to work, live and vote so why should I not celebrate. I understand that when the framers wrote the laws to establish this great country a black man was not considered a citizen or even a man so short of inventing a time machine and holding those people accountable what should black Americans do on the 4th of July. I celebrate all the ones who came before me and died so that I can live in The United States of America. It is my opinion that all the hard work was done by those who lived before me. They were in chains, hung from trees, spit on, made to sit in the rear, walked miles to vote and broke down barriers that I can never fully envision that's why I celebrate. I honor them by enjoying all this country has to offer.

I know our history is marred with the ugliness of racism and hatred. God puts my sins behind him and grants me grace. I forgive those slave owners, KKK members and all who fought to keep us down. Let's move on and enjoy the freedoms given to us by God and recognized by the men who wrote the Constitution. There are people willing to die just for our birthright, the chance to make it in America.

I get chills every time I hear The Star Spangled Banner and wish that God had given me a beautiful voice to sing, he did give me a heart that is fired up about glorifying his name and works. Our country is blessed because God was woven into the American foundation.

One of my family's favorite movies is Independence Day. That film is about regular folks who stood by soldiers and leaders against aliens that attacked our country. The fictional president strapped himself into a fighter jet to protect his people. I must compare Bill Pullman's character to our current leader who circles the globe apologizing and bowing down to world leaders. I want a president that will join the fight against those who mean us harm. If Obama were the president we would be speaking klingon.

I am headed to proudly walk in my local parade along side my neighbors and friends, see you there. Wave the flag high.

Remember The Simple Things

I get so many great ideas while running. The other day I was running and one of my favorite romantic artist popped up. I know the standard R & B crooner is Luther Vandross, he is hands down the go-to-guy of romance but there are other options. There is one fellow who is smooth, subtle, direct and very sexy, James Ingram. I love, love, love "Find 100 Ways". He is so low key about keeping your woman happy. No fireworks, no outrageous demands just find 100 ways to make her happy. "If it is violins she wants, let them play", simple. I take this to mean look for the things she likes and remind her. He tells the man not to play it cool, that won't help you keep your love warm, find her some moonlight to wear. Some men think that Valentine's Day was invented by a female greeting card executive to make men buy gifts for women. I won't Google the origin but I would like to think it is a friendly nudge to couples not to take each other for granted as we carry on our day-to-day duties of work, kids and the million other things that occupy our minds. When you are a busy family that day may mean the husband and wife get a sitter, catch a movie or eat a meal that is not served in styrofoam, alone. It is great if you can afford to buy big ticket items, go ahead boost the economy but it means so much more just to spend quiet time remembering the attractions that brought you together in the first place. That reminds me of another James Imgram song, "How Do You Keep The Music Playing?", "how do you lose yourself to someone and never lose your way", that's deep. In closing, don't spend money on useless heart shaped items that will be on clearance 50% off on the 15th, keep in simple stupid, go for the heart strings, tell her you remember the movie when you shared a Coke for the first time.... Denzel Washington's Ricochet (1991) and I love going into Walgreens and buying the biggest box of chocolates, on the 15th.

Scott Brown - Liberalism Rejected

Happy Anniversary America! One year ago you put into office the first half-black president. Since that history making day it seems Obama's agenda was to keep making history by attempting to control every aspect of our lives. The Stimulus Package, bigger than ever, Cap N' Trade, and finally my favorite "The Mega Healthcare Bill".

Last night Massachusetts history was made. After a half a century of Kennedy family rule folks demanded a real "Change". Scott Brown is the little engine that could. Can you imagine having the nerve to think that you can compete against the Massachusetts Democratic Machine? The time was right for a conservative victory, after a long year of liberalism gone wild, they have been behaving like teens on spring break, no accountability.

To the casual observer a victory in a state so far away may seem unimportant, wrong. If the people in the bluest of states can reject liberalism in the birthplace of healthcare reform there is hope for us in states as far gone as Illinois. I love it when people think being a Republican or a conservatives means you don't care about poor people and just want to keep all your money for your own selfish desires. I love it even more when Democrats sell their money grubbing policies to the general population by promising only to tax the rich, the smokers, the gamblers, the bottle water drinkers, the fast food eaters and so on. Don't they get it that they are coming for them eventually too?

Who are these people without access to healthcare? I was 20 years old when I had Julian, without insurance. I did not go to a government plan to pay for my delivery, I went to Micheal Reese Hospital in Chicago. There we were given a payment plan and each visit we were suppose to make a payment. Our financial situation was unstable at best so we did not always have money to make a payment but each visit they took my blood pressure, measured my belly and sent me on my way. When it was time for delivery I have no idea how many payments I had missed but they still took the baby out and did not hold him for a payment. When the bills came we bought food and paid rent then sent the what was left to the hospital, we did not pay them first, I like eating. I share this because some might think I don't want universal care because I don't know what it is like not to have insurance, and that was not my last time we were without insurance. I know there are hard working people without insurance but don't get on national television and lie to America with stupid statements, "..every 10 minutes an American dies due to lack of healthcare". The 2 plans proposed still don't cover everyone but working people will be taxed long before they would go into effect.

It has been a year, so can we finally call it Obama's recession? Is the the Bush administration finally off the hook for everything Obama inherited? Yes maybe he left a mess but Obama made the choices of how to handle each problem. Obama begged for that job for 19 months and when got what he wanted he complained that he did not no how bad things were. I beg to differ, all throughout the campaign he outlined what Bush had done wrong and he was the only one smart enough to save us. To quote Obama's pastor Rev. Wright, "the chickens came home to roost", he made promises that were too great for any man to achieve. Today I heard a commentator say, "What do we know about Scott Brown?", oh now they want to check resumes, I said that for 19 months about Pres. Obama and when I pointed out obvious character issues I was told all politicians attend racist churches and mingle with unapologetic terrorist.

Dear President Obama,

Stop trying to make history, just limit government interference in our lives and protect us from those that wish us harm and you we will do the rest. History will be made.

Love,

The United States of America

Happy 5th Birthday Reagan Wayne

Five years ago I started this day checking into Good Samaritan Hospital for a c-section. After four years of loss I thought that day would be a sad one. Both my parents were there to welcome the latest addition which made me feel comfort and fear at the same time. I kept thinking they would be the first to console me if things went wrong. When the nurse attempted to shave my tummy the clippers died, I was convinced that was a sign. All during the pregnancy I thought every check-up was going to lead to bad news. I had weekly ultra-sounds the end of my pregnancy, each week my doctor would say, "You have a fine looking boy" but I was still nervous.

Once inside the delivery room I was a wreck but remained calm on the surface. There is a funny tale of how I lost my balance on the operating table, grabbed for support and groped the anesthesiologist. We were all talking about Bill getting a vasectomy, that guy spoke up and confessed to having had one only for me to feel him up, those tables are very narrow.

Of course the day was filled with blessings. Reagan Wayne was beautiful and because of my regiment to control my blood sugars he weighed less than any of my children. I still gave in to my cravings but I rode a stationary bike after each trip to my favorite dive. Harold's Chicken Shack made a mint that year.

This is an un-official notice to the parents of kindergarten children that will enter Lisle School District 202 next year and spend the next 13 years as Reagan's classmates. I spent four years of hoping for a miracle thinking time was running out and then I was given the opportunity to be Rey's mom, therefore I think the sun rises and sets on this little piece of heaven. I know all parents feel this way but I am still in disbelief that he is here. I think he can do no wrong and even if there is videotape evidence =0). Seriously, I know he is just a kid that will go on to have moments of praise and times of scolding but thanks to my experience I will cherish every moment.

My team of doctors treated me like royalty and made my dreams come true. Though I was blessed with a talented specialist at one point I rushed to Target to buy a home monitor to hear Rey's heartbeat because I felt that there was no way I was bringing home a baby. I scrambled to use the device in my van in right there the parking lot, after a failed attempt to hear the heartbeat I turned it over to God. It was clear that a $20 device had nothing on God. My dear friend Kim Robinson reminded me that this story was in His hands and it was going to have a happy ending.

I confess to treating him like a baby some 5 years later, why not? I understand that at some point he will be too big to carry but for now I label that strength training. He has more nicknames than all four other kids combined, how many ways can you say happiness, which happens to be one of his pet names. I love all my kids but even the other four would tell you that Rey has made our family complete.

Funny People

This movie is funny but not for children. I have kids 24-4 and I would not have felt comfortable with any of them sitting in a theater. You know how some R rated films are peppered with a few words or gestures that are borderline racy this film is not one of those. Not for children. I recommend this movie if you enjoy Judd Apatow and his crew of regulars this will make you laugh. Adam Sandler proved his range of funny to extremely serious. The story goes behind the curtains to show the life of a stand-up comic. The lead character played by Sandler is a huge success but somewhat of a sellout for making mindless movies that allow him live quite well. He is diagnosed with a blood disease, his only hope is to try Canadian experimental drugs. He evaluates his priorities, after all his great success his person life suffered and he was alone. He hires a fresh up and coming comic Seth Rogen to be an assistant/joke writer. Their relationship becomes a friendship. I enjoyed watching the process of how comics develop concepts and tweak them into funny jokes. If Godfellas went on record for using the f word more than any other movie Funny People uses penis/balls/ball sack more than I could count, be prepared. It's difficult for me to review without spoiling the plot but realize this film is not just a comedy it deals with some serious issues of difficult life choices. To forgive or not to forgive that is the questions quite a few times. There are a couple scank moves by the female characters, sad. Be prepared for this movie to stop instead of it ending. Go and see Funny People.

A Flash Of Genius

Greg Kinnear portrays the lead character in a film based on the true life story of Robert Kearns an inventor who sued the Ford Motor Company for stealing his invention of the intermittent windshield wiper. Kearns was a PHD, college professor and a family man, in good faith he entered into a deal with Ford to buy the wipers he and his children would produce. Ford backed out of the agreement and 18 months later Kearns saw a Ford Mustang with his wipers driving down the street. The story is a classic David and Goliath tale of the little guy not backing down when battling a company with unlimited resources, the process was 12 years long. He was told by everyone from business partners to family members that it was a fight he couldn't win. He has a mental breakdown and loses his job. Kinnear is amazing as the everyday family man that has a flash of genius. Dr. Robert Kearns had a deep rooted set of ethics. It is a simple story that rouses emotions of excitement, disbelief, sadness and rage. It is a family friendly film.

A Black Professor, A White Cop And The Bi-racial President

On Thursday July 16, 2009 a neighbor called 911 to say she saw 2 men entering a home. A white officer responds and encounters the black professor who had trouble entering his own home, the second man was the taxi driver. If you read the police report it sounds legit. Immediately this was painted as a typical case of a racist white cop and his brutality against the black man. I understand that there are racist people in the USA but every time a white cop interacts with a black civilian he or she is not automatically a racist, sorry this may be a shock to the folks that blame the white man for everything bad that has ever happened to the black community.

Obama had not heard the entire story when he replied to a reporter who asked what his thoughts were, he admitted to being a friend of the professor and said the Cambridge PD had acted stupidly. Later we learned this cop happens to have the support of his fellow officers and his union, this guys trains police officers about racial sensitivity. There is nothing in his file that indicates this man hates black men in America. Obama chose to once again address the issue but didn't apologize. He said both sides overreacted and invited both men for a beer at the White House. Of course he had to remind us that this is still a sensitive issue for blacks.

Let's pretend a white president had called a black officer stupid and failed to apologize after it was proven that the officer was simply doing his job. Do you think for a nanosecond he could get away without a formally public apology on the steps of a Historically Black College while handing two checks to both Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton simultaneously.

I am insane because I keep doing the same thing expecting different results, I tuned into a liberal talk radio show. Surely the callers would say stuff like, "I love me some Obama but he should apologize" or "Wow, maybe Obama had a flash back to when he was a victim of racism which is why he chose his words". Hold on to your wigs, I had to listen to ridiculous callers that said, the neighbor was a racist and didn't want blacks in her neighborhood and the cop had to know who he was but his ego prevented him from just walking away or my favorite was the cop should be charged with a felony and finally how dare the cop expect an apology from Obama, he is The President of the United States he doesn't have to apologize to a low ranking police officer. I assume this angry mob listened just like me as the liberal host read the report before he opened the phone lines but somehow they and the host felt like the cop was the villain.

The liberal hags on the View this week spoke out before all the information was revealed, Sherry Sheperd said, "This just proves that the only safe black people are the four living in the White House". I don't know how Elizabeth keeps from yelling out,"(---insert host name--) you ignorant slut", when one of those dingbats shares her thought for the day. I would need the Meryl Streep scrub down from the movie Silkwood after sitting next to them for fear that stupidity could be airborne.

Obama was 100% wrong for speaking out before knowing the facts and he should not have called a policeman stupid, officers are at risk daily when walking into unknown situations. I will wait for the white equivalent of Jessie Jackson to hold a press conference demanding justice. Some will argue that blacks can't be racist, so what do you call it when the black professor yelled out and accused the white officer of being a racist and made reference to the officer's mom? Revenge?

Obama sat at a racist church for 20 years, when questioned he said he could never deny Rev. Wright anymore than he could the black community or his white grandmother that had been known use racial stereo-types, he later separated himself from that church, way to stand by your principle. His supporters never called him on that incident and I will bet my Dick Cheney VP lapel pin (awarded to my husband when he fed him at Northern Illinois University) that they give him a pass this time also. When will the healing begin?

Today Monday, July 28, 2009 we learned that the neighbor who was doing a good deed hired a lawyer. Just like they did with Joe the Plumber the left-wing media will crawl all up in her business and try to prove she had some hidden agenda, maybe they will find her great-great-great-grandfather owned a slave. Of course Rush was crucified for saying that Obama is angry black man, well isn't he? I argue that he attended Trinity for 20 years, I heard one sermon and it made me angry. The White house said Rush was fanning the flames, Obama and the professor dragged race into this issue. If that cop was black would this story still be in the news? Dennis Miller said, "You can judge a person by the character of their enemies."

They Are Coming To A Town Near You Soon

Each year summertime brings food, fireworks, family and friends, it's a tradition but wait there is one more, carnivals. The trucks have made their way down the main street of our small town and set up the rides, games and the strange group of employees. If we can have a successful company called College Painters why can't we have College Carnies, you know a clean cut group of kids in buttoned down shirts from local universities eager to travel and provide wholesome service to nearby communities but no. (Warning, if you or anyone you know works or have worked for a carnival company and the following description does not apply to that person, great have them come to Lisle because our carnies are scary.)

As you nibble on your over-priced elephant ear take the time to gaze at the employees of the carnival company. They should be easy to spot, they are wearing a purple or royal blue polo shirt that is either too big or too small and wear black jeans, I have always wondered why they don't mandate khaki shorts it's 95 degrees. The ratio of teeth to tattoos is 1:1 and finally there is a cigarette hanging out of their mouths. What other job allows you to work with children and smoke at the same time, open air, travel and all the corndogs you can eat, the perfect dream job. No normal people need apply.

My favorite carnies are the ones working the games, they yell to get your attention as you hurry by, "Come and try your luck" or "Hey Miss Lady" is what they say when a "sister" (black woman) walks past. Last year my son and his buds complained to the worker because they won twice and was told it didn't count. When they told potential suckers/customers to stay away, the carnie yelled things I cannot type. They were just 11 year old smarty pants kids who did not deserve what they got.

They are often dirty and unpleasant but these individuals are invited by authorities to our community each summer. How many are on parole or are wanted by the police? I am not a snob but these people could not complete the screening process of your local fast food restaurant but yet they are allowed to work with our most precious possessions, our children.

Safety is another issue, they assemble these attractions weekly which should mean they are experts at meeting the regulations. My friend and her son were electrocuted by a live wire touching a metal fence, thank God they survived but they were not met with kindness and concern. No offense when I saw a one armed senior citizen with a cigarette I thought this guy doesn't care if there is left over screw labeled, "important".

I love the day after the fest closes and I drive past the coin operated laundry and see the trailers parked there. They are washing loads of polos and jeans before heading to the next sleepy town.

I must confess that have not gone to our fest yet so maybe this year will be different from the last 15, I can only hope.

Michael Jackson and BET Tribute

Before I shred the 2009 BET Awards I must say I am impressed with how quickly they pulled together the performers who learned a Michael Jackson song and or dance routine to honor him. Now on to Michael Jackson's death and the 24 hour coverage. I grew up with a sharing a room with a play cousin (not really related) who is 2 year older and we would drift off each night talking about what we were going to be when we grew up. Cindy was going to Hollywood to be a singer and she was going to marry Michael Jackson. I believe Michael was a musical genius and one of the best entertainers we have ever seen.

We are caught of guard by his sudden death but talk radio host Bill Cunningham said it best, Michael did not cure cancer, bring peace to the Middle East and most of all he is not a person we would want our children to immolate. Yes he toured the world causing fans to fill stadiums, drop to their knees and cry but you would be hard pressed to find anyone to trade places with Michael Jackson. It would be even harder to fine anyone that would allow him to babysit their children. I know that he was never found him guilty of those charges but once cash exchanges hands it looks like hush-money.

If you remove the accusations of child molestation he was still very strange and that's ok most artist are quirky. There is a long list of entertainers that have danced to their own music but if you choose to sleep in an oxygen chamber, cover your children with colorful scarfs, marry Elvis's daughter, pay someone to have your children and keep the kids from their mothers you should expect some criticism. I understand why the E channel would have 24 hour wall to wall coverage but the news stations need to concentrate on what is going on in Washington D.C., they may try to pass the healthcare bill during the funeral.

Ebony and Jet magazine were created when black America did not have a voice but when the modern black media refuses to cover negative aspects of black celebrities and scream racism when "they" cover the incidents it is not fair. I want to know the good and bad of what any public figure does, if you are famous and accept all the money and perks, guess what we are going to call you out if you marry your step-daughter, I wish would ever watch another Woody Allen movie and I find it creepy that actors will work with him and fans still want to support his projects.

I mention race because Jamie Foxx mentioned "black" so much during the award show that paid tribute to Micheal Jackson. He said that MJ was our black man loaned to others but he is our black man. "We have a great black president" and "Make some noise black people" are just a couple of quotes. They could have truly honored Micheal if the show was not focused on promoting Jamie Foxx's up coming tour, "Blame it on the alcohol" is a very positive message for black people. They were honoring a great performer but Jamie told a penis joke and talked about having unprotected sex during an HIV commercial, very tasteful.

Back to the Jackson family and the pain of such a sudden loss. Families commonly reunite and stick together during times like this but they had a distant relationship with him at best. I remember an interview with Janet months after the birth of Prince and she had never seen the baby, they were rich enough to fly anywhere in the world and she had not met her nephew. Reports are that those children didn't know the Jackson family and I only hope that is not true. It is horrible when any child loses a parent but normally they have had a relationship with extended family members to help with the healing. Joe Jackson obviously in deep sorrow, used his interview on the red carpet as an opportunity to say he wishes that the world had recognized Micheal's talent when he was alive, huh? and he is working on a Blue-ray project, more information later,"Always be closing", (Glengary Glenross).

I had never watched the BET awards so I don't know the flow of a normal show and who gets honored. I don't know why LeBron James brought 2 people on stage to accept his award and thanked Micheal for what he did for basketball, I had no idea he played or was he thinking they were honoring Michael Jordan? Most of all I want to know what happened to Lil Wayne and T-Pain during their childhood. T-Pain said during his speech, "You know what I'm saying" and the answer was no, I had no idea. My sister would say they are poets of modern hip-hop, I never liked poetry.

I picture Jessie Jackson and Al Sharpton stuck in the doorway of the Jackson mansion trying to squeeze in to be named official spokesperson of the family. Those 2 had to clear their schedule of what I don't know since they seem to make a living hogging the spot light and turning everything into a racial conflict. They must keep a bag packed like a pregnant woman ready to leave and give birth at anytime, you never know when a poor black stripper trying to make a descent living might get rapped some rich white boys.

Rest in peace Micheal your music touched the world and made so many stop, think and feel. He is the King of Pop.